This spring brings many changes in our lives- again. Each of these changes tests my faith and commitment to Jesus Christ. It is the way He has designed them, and they fulfill His purpose for me.
My family has undergone a lot in the past decade. You might think that that is not unusual- a family should have a number of changes in a decade! However, our family has experienced so many changes that it somewhat boggles my mind to reflect on them.
We have experienced every sort of familial change you can get- with the exception of one of us being divorced. Family members dying, parents becoming very ill in their old age and requiring consistent assistance from us. Our two oldest children left the nest, one married and moved to another State, the other joined the Air Force and is also far away. My husband's job situation had been off and on for a few years, and our finances have been stretched very thin. We have at times relied on the help of our friends and church to "make it" through these times.
These years have grown in us a trust in the Lord that would not have been there otherwise. I distinctly remember when one disaster hit sitting down and saying, "The Lord gives and He takes away, blessed be the name of the Lord." I assure you, this would not have been my normal response prior to all this. However, I had seen how God's hand moves and works and in each preceding trial He revealed to us His faithfulness, care, and love. We never went without, we always made a way. That is a testimony to Him, not our resourcefulness!
And now another change is in the wind- leaving our home. This home has witnessed all these changes and has been at the center of some of our greatest struggles and joys. We have literally put our blood, sweat and even tears into the walls and floors of this old barn of a home.
The walls echo with the love we have had here. Our children all grew up here, and the sound of their feet pounding down the staircase and out the door to play echoes through my mind. The smell of the lilacs in spring, the nights sitting on the long front porch watching the stars...these are but a few of the memories.
We destroyed and rebuilt a part of this house- Larry and I. We laughed and enjoyed the process, sometimes well into the wee hours of the night as we laid flooring, or painted newly built walls.
Our kids saw their first day of Kindergarten from this house, and graduation from High School. Homecomings, Proms, first dates, parties, dinners, friends and family all feed into why it is so hard to go... If these old walls could speak.
Change is hard. I know God's grace abounds to me in this. It is at His direction we leave here! Not His audible voice of course, but a sure and settled belief that it is time for the next chapter in our lives. One that will soon be just Larry and I.