Divorce is ugly business. It sure seems to bring out the worst in people who once upon a time proclaimed to love each other "till death do you part."
Divorce actions give the impression that anything goes. The two people feel it is ok to say whatever they please to each other no matter how cruel it is. They seem to even go out of their way to hurt one another by flaunting new relationships and freedoms in the face of their husband or wife. I have seen Christians engage in this sort of behavior acting just like their heathen counterparts. This should not be.
Even in a divorce situation Christians are to act in a God-honoring manner. We are to say and do things that glorify God no matter how hateful and horrid our spouse acts toward us. This goes sorely against the grain, against the flesh. Our flesh cries out for vindication! Our flesh cries out for revenge and equity! Our flesh cannot stand the thought of being taken advantage of or being made a fool of.
Yet the call of Christ is that we be less concerned with our vindication than our righteousness in Christ. Our Lord asks us to humble ourselves the He might lift us up. This does not mean that we sit idly by and not act wisely regarding things. We do not throw our hands up and glibly declare, "Whatever!"
In this age, we must be responsible to participate in the legal actions that preserve us financially especially if there are children involved. God does not require we lay down like a rug and be walked all over and taken to the cleaners in the name of Christianity. He does expect us to be wise in our dealings and preserve and fight for what we need. Then we can trust Him for it all. Doing this, we can know that however it turns out we have done what is right before God, and that His will has been revealed.