Last time we began to answer these questions posed to a woman whose husband has been unfaithful and who is contemplating divorce: if you wish to divorce him you must ask yourself what doing so will accomplish spiritually. Will divorcing him glorify God? Will he see Christ in you? Will you grow and change into the image and likeness of Christ through divorcing him?
In the previous post we looked at if divorcing him would glorify God. Today we will examine if divorcing him would help him see Christ in you.
You may be wondering if he will he care about seeing Christ in you if he is not a Christian. Maybe not but we do not do righteous acts for men to see that they may glorify us (Matt 6:1ff) but that they might glorify God.
1 Peter 3 tells wives that they may possibly win over their unbelieving husbands by their conduct that reverences God. If this will win over an unbeliever, how much more impact would a loving and respectful wife win back her husbands heart if he is a believer? It is never wrong to honor God, even at personal expense. Even when it means that your pride is wounded and that you are deeply humbled a greater desire is to want people to see Christ in you, for He is the hope of glory!
Bearing up under such difficulty is another aspect of trusting God and will bring you to bear a closer likeness to that of Christ. As I went through this process myself many years ago now, I did not realize the changes that were taking place in my heart and overflowing into my life. As much as I wanted my husband to see that I had changed and grown in my faith I learned it was not important to him. This may be the case for you as well but dare I say is that the point?
Remember, if God chooses his heart to be affected by your actions it will be for no man can fight against God. In any case, our "job" even in the midst of a trying or difficult marriage or pending divorce action is to glorify God. If you determine to do so, you will soon find your thoughts changing. As your thoughts change your actions and words will change, and your desires will change. As all these changes take place in your heart and overflow in your life you can be sure that people will see Christ in you.
You will become long suffering, forbearing, loving and kind in ways you could never imagine! Even in the face of tremendous pain and sorrow your life will radiate Christ. Jesus was a Suffering Servant, the book of Mark reveals the servant heart of the Lord and since He is to be our example in how to live life you may want to spend some time reading this Gospel.
I think it is important to say that these things hold true even if your husband has not been unfaithful to you, but is still ornery and harsh and cruel in your marriage. These principles don't only apply to adultery!