When I am Lied To...

No one likes to be lied to. It destroys trust and can ruin relationships. What is the correct and biblical response and how do you overcome that impulse to be sinfully angry? That is the topic for today's blog posting.

I am a person that detests being lied to. It is one of those things that will cause me to explode in sinful anger (confession). As has been said, lying destroys the bonds of trust that have been built up and gives a person reason to doubt what they are being told is true.

We become angry because we are hurt. Our anger is understandable and perhaps even righteous because the Bible says that God hates lying lips (Prov. 12:22). What we do with the anger is what gets us into trouble. If we respond sinfully with screaming and swearing that is wrong. If we respond in a vindictive manner by giving the silent treatment that is also wrong. But what do we do with these emotions that want to take us captive in the heat of the moment?

To keep yourself from falling into the trap of a sinful response, you must train your thoughts on Scripture so that in the moment you can respond righteously.

Ask questions of the one you are in conflict with rather than making accusing statements.

Before you speak ask yourself if what you want to say to the one who has hurt you will help the situation- is it profitable? Will it give grace to the hearer (Eph 4:29)? Or are your words designed to hurt and cut them to the quick?

You want to learn if the person understand what lying really is? Sin is often sugar coated as "a mistake" or "boo boo" and glossed over to avoid making an issue of it.

Often, people are so accustomed to lying that they think little of it. Help them to see that lying has serious consequences and teach them to put off the heart attitudes of selfishness, pride, and fear of the opinions of man that lead us to sin in such a way.

A liar will remain a liar until they begin to put on the truth - first to the heart and then to their life. You may be able to help them to learn this truth and to teach them how to put off lying as a lifestyle.

The most important thing to remember is you must forgive the one who hurt you by their deception. Keep the lines of communication open with them and keep working on coming to a resolution that would honor and glorify God.