Peacemaking is a large part of being a biblical counselor/discipler. Have you been in the position to be a peacemaker yet? In the Beatitudes, Jesus says, "Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the children of God." (Matt 5:9) As always, we must apply truth to our own hearts first.
We are called by God- all of us are- to "go and be reconciled" with one another (Matt 5:24). The desire to do so is an evidence of the very presence of the Holy Spirit within us. How many of your relationships are out of order? How many have discord and animosity as a rule rather than the exception?
Our very position in Christ is based upon reconciliation, and our having been gifted a forgiveness we do not deserve! We have been forgiven based on the grace of God, not on our own worth or penance we have done. Our response to such wonderful grace is to forgive as we have been forgiven (Col 3:13).
I confess that peacemaking is not always easy for me. My flesh still desires to be vindicated when I am wronged! I would much rather defend my position and redeem my reputation than allow myself to be falsely accused or slandered. These types of betrayals seem to be the worst.
There have been a few times in my ministry life that I have been betrayed by people in the church that I loved and trusted. I think what made it hurt do badly is that those people were my family; part of my eternal family and I loved them and respected them.
The truth is people with whom we have no relationship really cannot hurt us, they cannot betray us to the extent that our loved ones can. This causes us to withdraw and want to hold people at an arms length and have only superficial relationships with people.
Have you noticed your pastor's wife? Many pastor's wives do not have close friendships but many acquaintances in the church. There is a reason for that! Many have been so deeply hurt over the years by those who befriended them and eventually turned on them and their husband as they left the church. After a while it just seems easier to have only superficial relationships because they don't hurt as much. How sad!
Sisters in Christ, this should not be the case in our churches. The church is to be the example for the world of love and compassion and sacrifice. How we have miserably failed in many circumstances...
Peacemaking is a calling for every Christian- counselor, discipler, or pew sitter. Each one of us has a responsibility before God to apply Biblical Theology for conflict resolution in our homes and our churches, our families and our church family. To refuse to do so is frankly shameful and disgraces the name of Christ, the Ultimate Peacemaker.