There are times in life where I have to remind myself of things I already know...
I delight in being an impoverished beggar. While not in the physical sense I certainly am in the spiritual sense! It was not always so! I am a competent and intelligent woman who loves logic and reason. I like things to make sense and I like to figure out what makes things tick. So becoming an impoverished beggar is/was not an easy thing for me but I have learned it is true.
I am completely dependent on someone else for my salvation. As a beggar I have no means to affect my own regeneration, forgiveness, or justification. I am incapable of accomplishing this in any respect. I had to surrender any belief that I could and I had to submit myself to the plan of someone else. I had to come hat in hand and humbly ask someone to do for me what I could not do and accept that it had cost them everything they had in the process.
Another thing I had to accept as an impoverished beggar was that even the purpose for my life was now not my own! I had different plans and dreams...but because I am a simple beggar who was redeemed out of the pit I am beholden to another, the One who has paid my ransom. I must now do the things that He has determined I would do for this is why He paid my debt, that I might serve Him alone.
The job is hard and often times it brings me sorrow for I am constantly giving up what I would rather be doing for His plan and purpose in each day. I have become sensitive and compassionate to the needs of others often placing my own wants aside for the purpose of serving them and assisting them as they struggle and wrestle with life.
The beggar has no rights and is submissive to the authority of the Master, realizing that everything I have and everything I am is because of Him and I am His. I can lay claim to nothing, not even my next breath...
Because of this, life has changed and I see that my strengths must be subjected to His will and His demands for my time and attention. A driving pursuit for God's righteousness has taken hold as I become more and more committed to honoring my Savior who I find I know so little about. The hunger of my soul is not satisfied with bread and wine, it can only be sated by filling it with Truth and the pure milk of the Word of God.
As a mere beggar I am in constant need of constant grace and mercy from my Benefactor. I must respond in like manner to those who offend and bruise me with hurtful words and actions. I must be able to accept and even to bear the sin of other people for that is what has been demonstrated to me. My ability to do so is an outward indication of the reality of my purchase, my being ransomed. My struggles to do so are an indication that I am in process; that this is a completely new way of life for a beggar who was used to a life of complete selfishness and self-indulgence.
I am learning this new way of life. I am a beggar-turned-princess, orphan-turned-beloved child of the King and this new way of life demands a new way of thinking. No longer can I dumpster dive into the filth of the world, I must now eat at the table of royalty. Although I am a beggar I have been washed and cleansed and I must now begin to think and believe that what I am in appearance I am internally.
The changes could lead me to a prideful spirit, but I must maintain humility and never forget I am always at the feet of my Master the King.
My King is not beloved by everyone, in fact some truly hate and despise my Lord. There will be times I will be called upon to make a defense for the changes within me and those that are visible. Not all people will accept that the King would love and accept a beggar such as I. My mere claim to belong to Him will lead some to hate Him all the more, and to hate me! As a grateful beggar I accept that I may be harassed and persecuted and even injured unto death for His Name's sake. I will accept this gratefully.
In all these things I will rejoice and be exceedingly glad for great is my reward both now and in eternity!
Matthew 5:3-12 in personal application format