When a woman has
been physically abandoned by her husband she suffers on many levels. She is
suddenly alone and has to deal with all the normal things of daily life in
addition to all of her emotions of abandonment and possibly the emotional
fallout of her children.
So many times the
woman will tell me things feel so out of control that she doesn’t know if she
can bear it all. Her focus is on the
situations and circumstances that surround her and it is easy to forget she
serves a great and powerful God.
When you hear her
speak of her life being out of control, remind her of the life of Paul. In 2 Corinthians
11:23 Paul outlines his own trials and troubles for us. Frankly, he faced more hardship
than any of us can truly understand. Paul said he was:
In far more
labors, in far more
imprisonments, beaten
times without number, often in danger of death. Five times I received from the Jews thirty-nine lashes. Three times I was beaten with rods, once I was stoned, three times I was shipwrecked, a night
and a day I have spent in the deep. I have been on frequent journeys, in dangers from rivers,
dangers from robbers, dangers from my countrymen, dangers from the Gentiles, dangers in the city, dangers in the wilderness, dangers on the
sea, dangers among false
brethren; I have been in labor and hardship, through many sleepless nights, in hunger and thirst, often without food, in cold and exposure. Apart from such external things, there is the daily sin without
my intense concern?
Yet even in the
midst of such physical hardship and misery he tells us in Philippians 4:11-12
Not that I speak from want, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am. I know how to get along with humble means,
and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have
learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need.
Help her to remember
that the Lord is at hand!
The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about
anything, Phil. 4:5b, 6a
That God is our
refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Psa. 46:1, ESV
Remind her that God
is completely sovereign and even this time in her life is under His sovereign
control. This means God is near and close by. He is not far away in some
distant place. She may believe God is on the outside, far away, and
disconnected from her life. And it makes
sense since the fearful person tends to remove God, she does not think He is in
the middle of her circumstances and she may not trust He is indeed near.
This attitude
contrasts with that of the Psalms, many of which refer to the Lord’s presence,
especially in times of trouble.
Remind her to be
thankful, even for this.
…but in everything
by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to
God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your
hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Phil. 4:6-7
Teach her to
remember God’s promises to her (1 Cor.10:13; Rom. 8:28-29).
As she learns
to think biblically she will conclude that God is sovereign (possessing supreme
power) omniscient (all knowing), omnipresent (everywhere all at once) and
omnipotent (all- powerful) God is always aware, always in control, always
navigating the circumstances and events of life.