Biblical Counseling for Women: More Than an Inconvenience

I know she loves her girls tremendously, but that status sure did communicate something else to me and probably others. It communicated that picking up her children from school was an inconvenience. It was an interruption to her day.

I admit that initially I got a holier-than-thou attitude. My day was full of my child because I homeschool. Picking up my child is not an interruption or inconvenience because my child is with me. I do not surrender my children to others to teach them, so I have time to myself to get “interrupted” from.

Thankfully, I stopped and thought about my friend again. Then I thought of me. I realized I was just like her.

Sure, I may not say, “Ugh. Time to go get the kids.” For me, it would be “Ugh. We have to start school. I am busy trying to get my email checked,” or “Ugh. I can’t believe I have to get this rat out of your hair again,” or “Ugh. The squirrels playing outside can wait because I am busy loading the dishwasher.” Even though I may credit myself for not saying it, it does not mean I have not thought it.

Yes, I am guilty of the “Ughs,” too. I am guilty of feeling inconvenienced when my child asks me something or needs me for something.

I know it is not right. So now, when I think “Ugh” I try to recover by going through U.G.H.

U—Uncover the sin. How many times have I corrected my child with, “Do all things without grumbling or disputing” (Philippians 2:14, ESV) and find myself just as guilty with every silent “Ugh”? “Ugh” is a sign of frustration. Frustration is a mild anger concerning something or someone getting in the way of what you want. Remember Colossians 3 tells us to “Set our minds on thing that are above” and to “put…away anger.” Then we are to put on “kindness, humility, meekness, and patience.” We cannot be putting on the right things if we are busy putting on any amount of the wrong thing. Can you put on a sock while you are putting on a blouse?

G—Gather you resources. First resource we can grab is the Word of God. Let us soak it up like a sponge, so when we get those moments of being squeezed, nothing comes out but the Word. Prayer. God tells us to bring everything to Him. He does not leave out the little things. Confess and ask for help. Christian music can be a big help. Listening to it throughout the day can keep filling your sponge! One of my favorite weapons is thanksgiving. How better it would be to say, “Thank You for reminding me of the time and for this math curriculum,” instead of, “Ugh. Time to start math.” Or, “Thank you for my child’s hair when there are children with cancer who have none,” rather than, “Ugh. I can’t believe I have to get this rat out of your hair.”

H—Honor your calling. You are where you are “…for such a time as this?” (Esther 4:14). Our purpose is to serve our family regardless of what inconvenience it may be to us. I really appreciate Charles Spurgeon’s take on the role of wife and mother. He said, “You are as much serving God in looking after your own children, and training them up in God’s fear, and minding the house, and making your household a church for God, as you would be if you had been called to lead an army to battle for the Lord of hosts.”

So instead of “Ugh” let our call be “Hoo-yah!” Instead of a bother, it is a battle. The day-to-day activities are not merely interruptions, but calls to invocation for the work of God. So, the next time I say “ugh,” I will remember to confess my selfishness, give some thanks, and shout a battle cry!